Surrender

IMG_3933.jpeg

My body’s now completely in rhythm with the new time zone after walking six lengthy and tiring days on the transformational Camino de Santiago—and FINALLY, I have time to pour my heart out into words.

Yet, as I sit here, there are no words. Only words that may exist somewhere outside of myself. Like distant background noise you can’t quite hear—or comprehend, only because you choose not to. 

But I do sense something deeply profound. A sort of empty bliss with an overwhelming sense of content. As though I’m right where I’m supposed to be. 

And it’s not because I’m away with my Luc.  As it’s just like any other day for me; knowing I deeply belong to something far greater than the mind can possibly comprehend.

Speaking of the mind, I’m also not conceptualizing anything. Moreover, not fighting anything I can’t control. 

It’s called SURRENDER—and it’s become a life habit.  

Living in my heart, letting go of the things I cannot control, while being at peace within myself and (mostly) everything outside of me (knowing I must find peace even in the worst situations).

The reason I’m bringing this up is I began to fully understand this sort of surrender right here on the Camino de Santiago the first time I walked it. Spending so much time with mySELF; letting go of any unnecessary thoughts that may arise, while feeling interconnected to ALL of life. 

And now, here I am, once again, back on the Camino for a fourth life-changing experience. Back for a second time with the person who can send me into a downward spiral—IF I would allow it. 

Most often our biggest challenge lies with the person we have chosen a life with—that’s precisely why I call Luc my greatest teacher.

And it’s a beautiful thing when you get to a place in your life that no matter who you’re with, or where you are, or what your situation may be, you’re simply presently here as a willing spectator, making the best out of “what is” (for instance, I broke a toe four nights ago by running into a piece of furniture in the dark, yet I taped my toes together and continued to walk). :0

Accepting the things you cannot control is key; whatever, whenever, wherever. And when something upsetting arises, like when Luc repeatedly and incorrectly completes my sentences, or he tells me how “I” feel—when he has no idea, I’ve simply learned to just PAUSE. 

It’s as though there’s a motionless breeze that forms within and around me, as I let any unnecessary thought dissolve into the background noise I choose to ignore; simultaneously bringing me back to the surrender that keeps me strangely joyful. 

People talk about the power of the mind. I think the real power is knowing when to lose the mind. Not trying so hard to conceptualize everything and stress over the things we can’t control.  

The real power is humbly living in your heart and staying there.

Surrender, surrender, surrender.

That’s all I have for now.

I’ll be back with stories, pictures and videos soon. :)